Marilyn Monroe’s crimson lips and not giving up on life

Sometime ago, Marilyn Monroe’s siren red lips was voted the most iconic beauty trend of all time.

The Hollywood star sported the striking bright pout during the 1950s and 1960s – most famously in the 1955 film, The Seven Year Itch – and MAC Cosmetics even created a lipstick range in her honor.


I couldn’t stop looking at her pictures! She was so BEAUTIFUL! I can understand all those men who chased after her and her fans who adored her. Her look of innocence was so alluring, captivating and radiated when she smiled- If only they knew how much sadness it was covering.

This post was supposed to be about how her crimson lips was voted the most iconic trend of all time but going through her pictures kinda made me sad. I don’t really know her full story. Mostly what I know is from watching Smash.

It just made me aware of how depression affects our lives and sometimes we don’t do anything about it till it’s too late. Depression is like a well (like the one you draw water from), a deep dark well. Each stage of depression takes you further, deeper into that well till you can’t see a single ray of light. When you’ve reached rock bottom is when there’s going to be serious trouble. You grope around the well, looking for something to hold on to, to climb out, but you can’t. It’s too dark and the walls are slippery. You try and try, but then fatigue creeps in and you can’t find the strength anymore to fight, to live… and then, you give up…

One of the secrets to dealing with depression especially when you feel yourself falling deep into that well, is to PLEASE speak to somebody close to you, that you love, a friend, a mentor, somebody, ANYBODY, because you don’t want to get to the bottom of that well. It’s frightening, dark and lonely down there and it’s really hard to come out when you’ve reached the bottom. I know…

You are beautiful, gorgeous, special, someone’s best friend, mother, daughter, sister, wife, aunty. You mean so much to lots of people and there are also quite a number of people’s destiny’s that are tied to yours. If you give up, so will that one person you would have offered a job, that child you would have brought forth to the world, that man whose life will change because of your love, that person who was about to commit suicide but changed her mind when you smiled and hugged her…

DON’T DIE! DON’T GIVE UP YET! Just one more day… One more step…

Remember: When the world says, “Give up, “Hope whispers, “Try it one more time.”

For Norma Jeane Mortenson (Marilyn Monroe) 1926 – 1962.

marilyn-marilyn-monroe 2

She is… was… really beautiful… 


guest post first featured on jagabeauty blog

From Me to You… JUST LET IT GO

It’s been 10 days, 10 months, 10 years
Really not that long though…
They say time heals all wounds…humbug!
Such bollocks-tsk-who said that again?
Guy must have been high on cheap weed when he wrote that (with all due respect sir)
There are somethings time never heals, you know?
But what I think is that you make a choice and decide to move on…
You go on and get busy with life
Whatever it is you do-Job, School, Church…
You meet new people, have new hobbies, travel…
But if that thing, person or event really did matter to you, it will stay with you forever
There’ll always be places, songs, gestures, words, pictures, bible verses, poems,…
That will always remind you of who or what used to be
In time, the tears will flow less frequently till they stop
The pain will ache so badly till they numb out
Because you’ll come to a realization that there’s nothing you could have done about it and you’re comforted in His words…
His words that say He’s not going to bring to you that which you can’t handle
And you draw strength from that wisdom
And you then face each day, knowing that no matter what you’ve lost,
You can’t afford to lose your hope, your joy, your faith and most of all your praise
You may never know why it happened or what went wrong,
You just come to the realization that you must let it go- JUST LET IT GO

You must make a conscious effort-this you must do by choice
So whether you like it or not, wake up everyday believing that something wonderful is going to happen in each day
And when the storm comes and the wind don’t blow your way, adjust your sails and sail into a new adventure,
Live each day to the fullest
Love like you’ve never loved before,
Sing and dance with abandon like you just don’t care!
Do something! Anything!
Just decide to be happy, ecstatically happy!

I don’t promise you the pain will go away
I don’t promise you that sometimes the tears will not flow without warning
I don’t promise you that you’ll always be spiritual about whatever challenge life brings to you
I don’t promise that you won’t blame yourself wondering if there was something, anything you could have done to have avoided that tragedy, that mistake
I don’t promise you also that you won’t often wonder whether you should have fought for what you believed in-
Isn’t that what they said? The wise ones?
“Go after you dreams?”
“If you don’t go after what you want you’ll never have it?”
“Don’t quit, every difficulty is an opportunity in disguise?”
“See it, believe it, make it happen?”
Seriously, the wise ones who came up with these quotes forgot to put a disclaimer at the bottom- “Terms and conditions apply. This does not apply to every situation.”…

And again I still cannot promise you that sometimes you will question Him because you still don’t understand the why, and you may never understand
But this one thing I can promise you
That His plans for you are good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope!
I can promise you also that He’ll never leave you or forsake you
And this I am so certain of and can promise without blinking- HE LOVES YOU SO MUCH!
And that will never, ever change-NEVER EVER!


My past does not define me!

Your past is past, it has no life. Don’t allow people, anyone, drag you back or rub in your face what they think is your story. Don’t give them that space.

Don’t sit around while people think they can determine your life or write your story.

It’s time you sit down and set your priorities right, know where you’re going. You are somebody going somewhere. You know where you have been, but that’s not your story. You are a survivor! Decide today that you will write your story and that story is going to inspire and impact lots and lots of people. You will be able to stand tall, head high and say, “Look at me now! You didn’t break me, just look at me!”

God doesn’t call you by your shame, He calls you by your name- BELOVED!


Smart, Opinionated and Imperfect


I want to show the world that I don’t have to imitate Margaret Thatcher (talk about being gristle) to be the head of a first world nation…

I want to see “Joy” embody, as a woman of influence, a woman of change, a woman of impact- what women of my generation strive to make possible: the idea that I can be smart, opinionated and imperfect (and married to a guy who is smart, opinionated and imperfect) as well as have a family and an emotional life when in position of great responsibility.

All I need to do is, STAND MY GROUND, keep fighting even after everybody tells me to sit down and shut up or relax. 

I am not just in this race of life to show that a woman can do it- No- I am in it to WIN, and win I will! I will not just be distinguished, I will be distinguishable.

July 2009


p.s. I don’t know if I got all or some of these words from the excerpt of a book! During my good ol’ fashioned writing days, I found that I got inspired by words I read in books, wrote them out BUT did not write my source down 😦 i’m sure Google will help me with some.

…so far mine will be an extraordinary journey

Today, I woke up very depressed. I didn’t want to face the world with its disappointments, with my disappointments. It seemed everyone was moving but me.

Then I read the introduction in the book ‘Life-The American Journey of Barrack Obama’, and it said:

“Some lives are, no matter an observer’s political, philosophical or cultural orientation so in arguably and objectively fascinating that to gaze upon them- to see the twists and turns, the lucky breaks and hard knocks- is a riveting pleasure… Throughout these chapters there are, as this is life, the pictures, telling their own revealing and vibrant story…”

And in the next sentence, I wrote those words, inserting my name:

I will now copy and say:

“…Here, then, is ‘Joy Ezeka’– so far mine will be an extraordinary ‘Nigerian journey’… There will be future chapters…”

And has it been an extraordinary journey since June 30th, 2009? Mmmm….

It has…maybe not as extraordinary as I would like it to be- Moved to another country, got experience as an interior designer, lost my job, discovered a new career, started my own company, still live far away from my son- but- there are and will still be future amazing chapters and I’m looking forward reading them.


Good Old Fashioned Writing


Sometime ago, I decided to start a journey, a journey to finding myself, finding love, my purpose on earth, discovering what I am supposed to be doing with my life and how to get there.

I was depressed and felt so lost so I went to the bookshop to see if I could get a book that could help me at that point. So I bought:

⇒ The Audacity of Hope by Barrack Obama

⇒ Life: The American Journey of Barack Obama

⇒ And a Journal! And I wrote! When I was happy, confused, I wrote, good old fashioned writing with a pen!

This was 29th June 2009.

It’s been a while I really wrote, before I discovered blogging and the pressure of writing and crafting words to suit an audience. I used to really enjoy buying journals and writing, good old fashion writing with a pen. Over the years I seem to have lost that thing…the writing thing, just for writing sake.

So I decided that I would type out what I had written in my journals over the years and maybe I would find that thing… just write- Just because.